run away?

almost a month since i last took the bus to kyrenia, spent my hours shuffling through my playlists. at some point, being in famagusta is just suffocating even though i am free without my family's judgement towards my drinking, being out late and so on. we got eight cats at home, we got citrus trees in the garden and an oven that is simple to use. obviously one misses it.

one also misses talking to a person, with a genuine wish to. not that i don't have company of my own in famagusta, but the thing is i am all alone in the house. other than that sexist series' sound echoing through the old greek cypriot walls, there is nothing.

cooking, drinking, reading and in the end, sleeping alone. i am lucky if the person i like actually has the time to give me a call and make my night.

so today i woke up after coming home from a good evening spent with a good friend, drinking together and discussing all things that made us alive. all i wanted was to run away from the town, when the morning light enters the room through spaces between, it becomes all too unbearable. i accept my defeat and wear my flower shirt, pack my tea and coffee in tins, leave everything as one would wish to find it once back.

my mother is cooking leek tonight. considering that i ate nothing that wasn't fried for a whole week, leek sounds divine. it smells divine. our kitchen is a cold place. actually, our house as a whole is a cold place because it's not isolated and everywhere you go it's marble and we didn't install any central heating systems, so on. our kitchen is warmed up with our conversations.

maybe it even "heats up", you know. sometimes it is just to regret i ever run away from famagusta, but i resist the urge to. anyways.

see, getting committed to writing a bit everyday. turns out, all one ever has to do is to stop saving stuff for drafts and actually publish. maybe maybe maybe. anyways. it's better if i leave now, focus my night on eating good food, watching the crown, and editing my work.

see you. if you can run away, please do.